The Strength Was Never Missing—It Was Always You

There’s something profoundly powerful that happens when you stop looking outside yourself for permission to rise. In every woman I work with, in every soul-searching conversation I have, there’s a moment when the realization drops in: you were never powerless—you were just disconnected from your strength.

We’ve been conditioned to believe that strength is something loud. Something aggressive. Something visible. But your truest strength? It’s quiet. It’s sovereign. It doesn’t shout, it doesn’t hustle, and it doesn’t need applause. Real strength is the decision to show up, again and again, even when no one sees the effort but you.

This isn’t just spiritual fluff—it’s backed by research. A recent study published in Nature Neuroscience reveals how mental strength and resilience are formed through what the researchers call “adaptive coding” in the brain. Essentially, our experiences—especially how we interpret and respond to challenges—rewire our brain’s capacity for future growth. The takeaway? The way you rise from your struggles is shaping the strongest, most intuitive, most grounded version of you. (Source)

But the world isn’t always kind to this kind of strength. We’re taught to chase certainty, to check the boxes, to seek approval. So we build lives that look good on the outside but feel hollow on the inside. We get so far from our own knowing that we forget we ever had it.

If that’s where you are right now—disconnected, uncertain, questioning everything—let me say this: that is not weakness. That is the exact place where your strength begins to wake up. According to Dr. Kristin Neff, a pioneer in the field of self-compassion, one of the most consistent predictors of personal resilience is our willingness to turn toward our inner world with curiosity instead of judgment. That’s the foundation of real strength: honoring what’s real inside of you, without needing to fix it or hide it.

When you stop resisting who you are—and start honoring who you’re becoming—you begin to access a level of power that can’t be faked or fabricated. It’s the kind that allows you to walk away when something doesn’t serve your highest self. The kind that helps you speak truth, even when your voice shakes. The kind that guides you to rest—not out of weakness, but because you value your energy enough to protect it.

Here’s what I know to be true: every time you choose self-trust over self-doubt, you become more magnetic. More grounded. More powerful. This isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about coming home to the woman you were always meant to be.

You don’t need to wait for a sign. You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need to take one bold breath and ask yourself: What would the strongest version of me do right now? And then follow that whisper.

Because the strength you’re looking for?
It’s already in you.
And it’s time to use it.

With love,
Pam